If you Feel that Way, it’s because you Chose to.

We are all entitled to our own feelings, but more than that, we are in charge of them. This means you feel a certain way because you allow yourself to do so. No one can force you to feel a certain way. Sure feelings and emotions are influenced by others. But when you say someone made you feel that way, you are allowing another person to have control over you. You are handing them a key and allowing them to make decisions about how you react.

Sometimes that emotion is that you have been hurt or wronged; you do not have permission to sulk in this feeling. You cannot alienate the person who might have offended you either. Rather you are responsible for addressing your offender. This keeps you liable.

Anger is a very strong emotion, and no one can make you angry, rather you choose to let other’s actions cause you to be angry. You can choose how to handle your anger and you must do so. It is very important to understand that only you can decide what to do with your anger, and taking it out on someone else, should never be an option.

If there something that causes you to feel joy, consider that a blessing. The feelings of joy and happiness are a blessing. However, it is not other people’s responsibility to help you feel happy or joyful. It is your choice to be receptive to joy and happiness.

Affections and interest for the opposite sex can be some of the hardest feeling to responsible for, not only for singles but couples as well. We can say all we want that we were “lead on” or that the other person caused us to be swayed. It is still our decision to keep those feelings in check. Maybe you have an interest and it is not returned, the other person does not need to leave the group because you don’t share the same affections. Rather you need to figure out what you are going to do with those emotions. If you are in a couple and start to be attracted to someone besides your significant other. Guess what, you also get to squash those feelings and transition them back to your special someone. Love is a choice.

To feel wanted, needed, and as a part of the group is at first your responsibility. Sometimes we are lucky and the group is embracing. If this not the case, jump in and get to know the people. It is wonderful if help you feel included, but you have to do your part.

Perception of the situation is the main way of interpreting your feelings. What better way to do something about your emotions than to change your perspective. Put yourself in other’s shoes. Loafers definitely feel different than high heels and “how are you doing?” is different than “how you doin’!” Maybe their actions weren’t intentional rather it just seemed that way from your perspective.

We are emotional beings and our outlook on life will continuously be affected by that. Do your part though and be accountable for where you are emotionally. There are too many people out there using others as excuses rather than reasons. Reason with yourself and choose to be in control of your decisions instead of letting others control you.