Preparedness for Closure

I don’t care who you are, people need a certain amount of closure. A time to find an ending, in order to have a new beginning. Closure many times helps us process through the situation.

Typically it occurs after the event happens. Whether it is a death, breakup, moving of a friend, loss of something, or disappointment; you can expect a person to seek after and gain closure after the event. It’s what helps them heal and recover.

Closure for me, seems to often occur at a totally different time than expected. I have this crazy ability to work through most things before they even occur. To be okay with the circumstance when I don’t even know the final outcome. Even as a child I can remember losing a pet and shedding a few tears but I was over it in no time, usually by the end of the day. I’ve had friends that told me they were moving away and sure I was sad, but the sadness usually ended about 2 weeks before they even moved.

Maybe it’s because I grieve while they still are here. I can remember doing that with my Granny. I grieved her death after her first stroke. Sure she was still alive for another 2 years, but she was never able to function well again. She was no longer to me, the person I knew as my Granny. So when she did pass, I had already shed my tears and went through the motions for everyone else.

I have even found myself even frustrated that something took so long to occur, because I had already resolved the closure part and it was still here. Like the before my God-brother went to Iraq. We knew it was happening; we had his going away party. Then it took was a couple more weeks before he went and I kept thinking to myself, “can’t you go ahead and go and get it over with?” He did end up going and made it back safely, but that time before he went was so annoying to me, I was done with the situation after the going away party.

I’m not sure why I am this way. Maybe because I try to always be prepared for any situation. Possibly because I lived most of the days of my life knowing that so and so wouldn’t be in my life forever so I might as well invest everything that I can, right now.

Whatever it is, it works for me. It helps me give all that I can right now while knowing I will be alright if there is not a next time. It’s a sort of preparedness for closure.