The Other End of the Exception

(Inspired by the Movie and Novel “He Just Not that into You.”)

Why is it that we continually run into the person that is not into us? Why is it that even though we are making all the right moves, it doesn’t pan out? Why is it that everything on paper says we should be together, but we are not? Why is it that he/she should ask us out, but they don’t? Why is it that we are being as intentional as we need to be, for it to work out, yet it doesn’t?

You are following the rules: you are not being too clinging, not stalking, spending the right amount of time with and without them, giving the right amount of physical touch to strike attention yet not too much, have the right amount of things in common, and are just chill enough in the whole thing that they should totally ask you out. They still don’t ask you out though. You are doing everything right according to the rules. It’s still not working though. Why not?

Then you look at them. So maybe it’s not about you. They might be a commit-a-phobe, too caught up in their own thing, too blind to see what a great catch is right in front of them, too shy to just ask you out, maybe this is not good timing for them, possibly they have had their heart hardened from past relationships, or they just need to learn a lesson or two to be with you. So they just need to fix themselves so they can be with you.

Sometimes it’s not about that either. For some reason it’s not working. Not working because of you, not working because of them, not working because of something bigger than the two of you that just refuses to let this relationship happen. It’s frustrating as all get out and you wanna do everything you can to make it work despite the fact. It just won’t.

That’s the other end of the exception. The unfathomable idea that even though this meeting of boy and girl should work out, it just doesn’t. It doesn’t because of a different type of fate knows you two do not belong together. It has a way of working even harder sometimes then the sort of fate that puts people together. It is a pushing kind of fate, rather than pulling. Making everything seem impossible, even though it should be possible.

You hate this fate, probably because by this time you’ve seen it most of your life, though you still can’t understand it. It refuses to let you have your way. Rejects your ideas of how things should be. Constantly denies you the chance to be with them. Another them, they were supposed to be the one, don’t you know that fate?

Maybe you should thank it though. Thank it for keeping you out of those situations where the person was all wrong for you or just wrong enough it wouldn’t work. You should appreciate it for keeping your heart safe. For working in its own secret way to keep you from getting caught up in something that looked good from the outside, but could have been detrimental in the end.

Maybe that’s why they weren’t into you, why the right moves didn’t pan out, why on paper it looked good, but you were never together, why they never asked you out, and why every intentional move was never read as planned. Perhaps you were never meant to be together. As hard as it may be to understand, you were never supposed to be with them.