All of the Times When We Didn’t Know We Were Saying Goodbye

Being single in your 20’s and dating is a very interesting sort of thing. It’s definitely not for the faint at heart. Nor is it for the hard hearted, at least in my experience anyway. You meet someone, you talk to them/text to them, decide on an opportunity to meet again and then…

Well here’s where it gets more interesting. The road can go one or two ways at this point: Hello or Goodbye.

I’ve had my fair share on both ends so please don’t think I’m a bitter single chick just ranting. Rather I am attempting to shed some light on a subject of my interest.

So here are the hellos. Hello, let’s continue to go with the original hellos of talking/texting each other. Hello, let’s hang out casually with other people involved, but it’s one more opportunity to determine if we should spend more time together. Hello, how about we go on another date or meeting up again? Hello, from this point as a single that is truly looking to be in a relationship I hope there are many more hellos and meet ups. Hello, I am truly serious want more one on one dating sort of hellos with you. The more hellos the more chance of this actually creating a relationship.

Then there are the goodbyes. Goodbye, it was great meeting you...and you never hear from them again. Goodbye, via a phone call/text message and there is never another hello, even if you send a casual message after weeks of nothing (hey people get desperate and both sexes do this). Goodbye, lets figure out sometime next week to meet up and next week never comes. Goodbye, oops I forgot to tell you that I’m moving away or my job/life now consumes my life so I don’t have time for you anymore. Goodbye, while we were hanging out I met someone else that I would like to start saying hello to more than you. Goodbye, our circles do not intermingle anymore so we might not see or speak to each other ever again. No doubt a goodbye, that one or the other does not see coming typically never leads to another hello.

The strangest part to me is how quickly it can either be hello or goodbye. There is often no way to tell in the beginning which direction you are headed. I’ve definitely been on dates with guys that I absolutely adored until I got home after the date and thought about it. Then, when I got his next hello I had to tell him as nicely as I could goodbye and that it probably wasn’t best for us to see each other again. He didn’t even see it coming, he had no idea he was saying goodbye.

Does it always work out this way for me? I wish!!! Oh I’ve had my share of goodbyes and didn’t know it. I had absolutely no idea that Mr. Meet Me on Wednesday at 6, would not ever meet me again on Wednesday at 6. I’ve also had the talk me up on the phone, but never follow through, so since we’ve taken this long, I guess this is never going to happen…didn’t know we were saying goodbye but goodbye.

It just happens and no matter how nice one or the other tries to be about it, most of the time it’s just goodbye and there was no way to be prepared or know about it. Then, it becomes just like all those other times when we were saying goodbye and didn’t know about it.