In love?

I had a friend post a blog recently about being “in love?. I couldn’t help but comment on it and I thought I would see what other’s opinions were about the subject. So here is what I said. After checking that out…tell me what you think:

“I read a book once that said being “in love? is one of the worst places to be in life. I agree! No I am not bitter about love...

Let me explain. When you are “in love? you are unable to think logically, realize what is going on around you, see the real picture, or envision the future. Being “in love? is a state that takes place in the present then after a period of time ends up leaving you with a mess of unanswered questions, because you have neglected to answer them during the time you were “in love?. Granted the feelings and emotions that are present during the “in love? state, are wonderful, and many times will lead you to a successful further relationship with that person. Those feelings should not be the only reason you choose to be with that person. Love is not feelings, love is a CHOICE! Or rather a series choices to continue to put your affections toward someone. I encourage anyone to enjoy the feelings of being “in love" but don't let them cloud your view of reality when it comes to making decisions about the person you want to spend the rest of your life loving.?

NO WINTER!

Just for the record I am against this whole winter storm they are forecasting. I wish no one had even mentioned to me, the fact that there might be one. I prefer to not know what weather is coming my way.

See I have plans, and winter weather gets in the way of my plans. My intentions are to go ahead with my plans, and ignore the fact that people keep talking about the impending storms. I suppose I think if I ignore the weather I will be able to do my plans.

I wish it would be like when I was in college, and nobody knew it was going to rain, it just started raining. Which also meant that if our vehicle needed parked in the freshman lot, we were gonna get rained on. So we made due and invited friends to walk in the rain with us. There was never a need to watch the weather and see if it would snow too much to drive on the steep hills of Branson, we just went along with our fun and let the weather happen when it happened.

So I am ignoring the warnings, and the weather forecasters don't exist to me. There will be no winter weather. No freezing rain, sleet, snow, or ice! I have heard no talk of cold temperatures nor is there any possibility I will have to change my plans.

Now I have said it there will be NO WINTER!

Do you ever wonder if they still care?

You know…those people from your past that for some reason or another are no longer in your life. Do you think they care that they are not in contact with you anymore? Does your name come up in their conversations or when they are lost in a daze? Do they think about what happened between you? Do they have an urge to fix it but feel their hands are tied? Did they get hurt so bad that they wish you wouldn’t come up in their memories? Or were you just dropped from all previous existence as if they ice-age froze over that section of their life?

I do wonder. I guess because I do still care. I want to fix things. I don’t want to lose people in my life and I want to put forth the effort. Even if we didn’t leave on bad terms and we just kinda lost touch. I will always care about the people that touch my life. From the person who smiled at me on a bad day all the way to my best friend from elementary school.

So how is it for you? Which one are you? Or… Do you fall somewhere in between the two? Let me know, because I wonder… its just what I do.

Everyone should read in the bathroom

Bathroom reading can be very benefical in two ways. Of course you know the first, but you might not have ever thought of the second.

You know those books that just have too much info to absorb the first time you read them. Like "Chicken Soup for the Soul" and "You May Not Tie an Alligator to a Fire Hydrant."

Recently I picked up a copy of "The Rockefeller File" by Gary Allen, which is another one of those books perfect for bathroom reading. Check out this quote: "The key to this system is giving up ownership but retaining control. for example, most people don't believe they really own something unless they retain title to it in their own name. The Rockefellers know this is a big mistatke. Often it is better to have your assets owned by a trust or a foundation--which you control--than to have them in your own name."

Try to absorb that kind of info plus half a dozen other facts while breezing through pages in your favorite comfy chair. Maybe some people can do it, but for me I prefer to do that sort of absorbing on a different sort of seat.

So grab a good fact filled reader and use a sheet of toliet paper for your bookmark if you want enjoy the whole experience. Just remember if their is a line for the facility you are using please be courtious with the amount of time your new reading destination might be taking up, and don't forget to flush!

When taking a jog is more than just exercise.

Well most of us have felt it, the rush of wind through our hair and the pounding on the pavement. We are heading down that pathway faster than the average walker, gaining ground on our destination. Objects are whizzing by in a blur. The air we are taking in is compressed, and is in a different pattern than normal. Our muscles are tightly forced forward. Our mind takes over the propelling that is occuring.

Then there is a rush, a feeling of release, leaving the cares behind, getting a clear visual, obtaining perspective, and finding a resolution. Indeed something has been accomplished here but it wasn't just exercise. No, those two plus miles were used for much more, and they will continue to be. Opportunity has presented itself for a rare moment of clarity. We sense it and thrive from its power.

We will try to remember state it takes us to, and promise to ourselves to repeat this activity again. Then one day it will cease to be about jogging instead it will be about the adverse. We will embrace it and it will be our time to confide in the force behind our tennis shoes. Then we will understand what is to be like a wild horse, where our will guides us towards the wide open pastures that streches beyond what the eye can see.

You have to do it for you.

There are many things in life you have to do for yourself and not anyone else. Mostly this is because if you do it for someone else you are not really truly changing yourself you are just putting on an act for that other person which ends up being your persona. This can happen in relationships, major life decisions, career choices, lifestyles, choices about health, and many other significant events.

No one is worth you compromising yourself for them. Because in the end they need to like you for you. As much as it might suck sometimes having someone lose interest because you are not the person they want you to be. You owe it to yourself to not be who they want you to be, because that sort of decision can only end in tears and heartbreak. Not to mention possible psychological problems.

I was even reminded recently by a married woman how important it is to not lose sense of yourself when you two become one. Remember opposites attract and there is someone out there for everyone whether it be a best friend or spouse.

But as long as it is a positive change, go for it. You do get the priviledge of choosing your pathway in life and how you are going to approach it. Take advantage of the fact that we get to choose so much of our destiny.

Anytime you change significantly it has to be for you and make sure you are being true to yourself. Remember no one can change anyone else they have to want to change themselves.

Being Single

So I get asked periodically why am I still single. I have a varied amount of responses I give, but really they are just guesses. Sure I am out there meeting people and there are guys that are interested. Is it that I am picky? Maybe I am noncommital? Am I not girlfriend material? Wait maybe it isn't me is it him?

I mean I think I am a good catch and guys have told me that I am. But for some reason, as of yet, I am single. My newest theory is that since I am not like other girls it kinda freaks guys out and they don't know how to handle me, the sensible and level headed girl, because they are so used to dealing with Demanding Divas. So to those guys I have to say, why not give it a try. You might like it and I am sure you won't hate it. But again it could be any one of the other reasons.

Regardless, I am not bummed about it, I am just wondering and seeking answers as I always do. Anybody else have any ideas?

What Do you Mean, I have no experience?

I am disgusted! Somehow I received this preconceived notion that once I graduate college with my Bachelor’s degree, I would be able to obtain a career that would lead to advancement opportunities. Of course I understood that my degree in Psychology would probably have to be advanced, but until then I started looking for something to start me along the career path.

What I found was a lot of road blocks. Sure you can send your resume out to many businesses but the one criterion that was on everyone’s list was experience. Not just an internship experience either. They wanted three or more years experience in the field. Which I would have no problem with, except how was I supposed to gain experience if no one would hire me for lack of it.

There are too many newly graduated college students working in retail and food service. Too many times they are looked over for jobs they are more than qualified for due to the fact that someone does not want to take the risk of employing a different type of employee. STATS

Besides that how much better of an employee will it really make me if I have worked under someone else for a couple of years and know how they wanted me to operate. What if your company operates differently and I am hesitant to change my ways? Could there be a possibility that I am burnt out of the profession but I thought that changing companies would help? How I did at the other company cannot truly reflect my ability to work for my new employer.

Sure I understand why it is necessary, and that perhaps it might make the employer’s task a little easier training-wise. However, what I see is that they are missing out on a valuable opportunity to train “fresh meat.” To teach someone the basics and not have to un-teach them things from their other job.

Ideally these new employees, without or with minimal experience, would be newly graduated. Students right out of college are also typically more driven and career oriented. They do not require a huge pay scale, although if you offer they are very appreciative. There is a lot of fresh book knowledge and new ideas they can bring to the table. Plus many are very flexible because they have not been engrained to monotonous responsibilities people gain over a life-time.

I believe employers are losing out on this opportunity and overlooking the fact that these “inexperienced” perspective employees are the future. Sure eventually someone will give them their break, but why let them get the advantage in the future when you can take advantage now. Talk to and interview them, you might be surprised at how much they do know despite having a full resume’. Take on the challenge of trying someone new, more than likely you won’t be disappointed with the product. I urge you to do your part in contributing to the career advancement of the younger generation and creating a new and improved workforce for the future.

I Went Missing

I went missing the other day. Did you hear the news reports? Were there alerts interrupting your favorite TV shows? Did the billboards flash, be on the lookout? Probably not. Why? Because no one knew I was gone. Not even the police. Nobody told them. Everyone was clueless. But I knew, I could feel and sense it. The air around me was a different density. The world took on a different shape. My feelings and emotions were a mix of eeriness and confounded. That short period of time, took me from where I had always been, to another realm.

Somehow I liked it, it was not a disturbing thing for me. It was acceptable that I was not to be found. The freedom nearly made me burst into tears. All the cares of others were cast aside. I was alone in the world, off in some hidden segment, and not a soul recognized it. Yes the other day I went missing.

What's in A Name?

Have you ever heard a name and it made you cringe? The simple sound of it sent chills down your spine or caused you to tense up? Why is that? I suppose it is because many times we can attach soooo much meaning to a name. We meet someone and for instance their name is Karen. Things are going pretty good between you two in your friendship. Then something happens and you are wronged by Karen. You weren’t necessarily wronged by all girls named Karen, but this one particular one did something. All of the sudden you find yourself repulsed by the name Karen. There is an automatic refusal to ever name your children that name because all Karen’s seem bad now. The next time you meet a Karen you refuse to get to know them because she is gonna be just like the other Karen you knew. Is this really fair, you ask yourself? But you can’t help but have a bias even if it is just based on a name.

Is there any logical truth in this? Does the name you were given at birth really group you into the Karen’s or Steve’s of this world? Is it possible to determine certain characteristics of a person based on their name alone or are we being unfair bigots against people just because of their name?

Regardless of what is actually happens, I find it ironic when two people of the same name act in extremely similar ways. For example: The Story of Two Will’s. I tried my best to not compare the two. Sure the first one had royally screwed up with me then we just stopped talking, out of nowhere. Then I met the second Will. He got a fresh start with me. Then the same stuff started happening with this Will as the other one. It ended the same way too.

This has happened with a few other names as well. Such as my friendships with girls named Ashley usually work out really well, no matter what. I am not saying that actually act on these feelings of prejudice in a name, its more or less a correlation I have found lately. So more than anything this really makes me wonder…What’s in a name?