Okay, I’m guilty of looking, I admit that though. What I don’t want to be guilty of is fawning. Getting so wrapped up in the possibilities of being with x or y guy that I miss out, miss out on friendship and the relationships with people around me.
Sure I’ve been there before, caught up by every move he makes, trying to figure out his motives. Asking myself if he called because of friendship or for something else? Wondering what this attention he is giving me is all about, sometimes finding out that he was oblivious to the fact that he was even giving me attention. Then, getting all caught up about what is up with him. It’s not worth it to me anymore!
Not worth wasting the time or will power. Too much time has been wasted already on times like this and I’m just over it. Sure I might sound like a girl that has been told recently that the guy I had an interest in isn’t interested back. Actually, this is not the case at all! I am just seen once again what a waste of time it once was.
It was sort of like when I was a child with training wheels on my bike. For no real reason, I would find a small dip and place my bike to where I could pedal all I wanted but get no traction. Then for stints of time I would just be “spinning my wheels.” Was it entertaining? Yes. Was it exercise? Sure. Was I getting anywhere? Not really. So what was the benefit? I wasted some time. Time I had to waste back then. But time I am not willing to waste anymore.
Does he like me? That is not really my concern anymore. Can we have a friendship and people to hang around with in a group and be friends? That is definitely more important!
11 years ago
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